Kemlo Longstaff begins a new series of fantasy rugby teams likely to be the subject of much debate. Have your say by leaving a comment at the bottom.
Whilst not a new concept, I fully embraced Fantasy XVs whilst on a stag do this summer touring round Europe. They helped to pass hangovers and were the subject of much animated discussion and full-blown arguments.
Honourable mentions must go to Joe Clapson (particularly on this XV) and Neil Chivers, but anyone who was on the Big Yellow Bus made a contribution of sorts.
This one was a popular choice and was one of the stronger XVs created. That said I think improvements can be made, particularly at 5 and possibly 15. Suggestions are more than welcome!
Cartoon Characters XV
1. Nanny (Count Duckula) – Not the most intelligent but powerful. Good West Country accent and a solid Cider drinker in the bar afterwards.
2. Donkey (Shrek) – More banter than Mark Regan and a good strike in the scrum.
3. Mr. Tickle – Just edges out the obvious candidate Mr. Strong. Long arms would have the opposition loose-head in all sorts of trouble with tight binds.
4. Inspector Gadget – A modern day versatile second row, the go-gadget arms and legs would be useful come line-out time. Would need Penny on the touch-line to oversee his game, however.
5. Denver (the last dinosaur) – Heavyweight, adding ballast to the pack.
6. Desperate Dan – Option as an extra line-out jumper and a physical presence at blind-side.
7. Taz (the Tasmanian Devil) – Mental, with an incredible and tireless work-rate around the field. An animal come the drinking games in the bar afterwards.
8. He-Man – You know it (CAPTAIN)
9. Popeye – Diminutive but strong in a Byron Kelleher way (providing spinach is provided pre-game), Not afraid to mix it up.
10. Donatello (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) – Brains and an athlete, and no need for body armour
11. Roadrunner – Outrageous gas and a talent for winding up opposition wingers, particularly if they go by the name of Wile E. Coyote. Not the best handling skills though.
12. Lion-o (Thundercats) – Vision, speed and a fearless leader, forms a powerful centre partnership with Bravestarr.
13. Marshall Bravestarr – Lets just look at his basic skills: a) Eyes of the Hawk – All seeing approach to the game b) Ears of the Wolf – Could pick out all opposition calls and team-talks c) Strength of the Bear – Amazing in contact d) Speed of the Puma – Useful on an outside break. The thought of Bravestarr running a switch off Lion-o is mouth-watering.
14. Speedy Gonzales – Gives up a lot of kilos but a deadly finisher.
15. Tigger – Risky, but exuberant choice for full-back. Has a deadly, springing step akin to the Fijian winger Vilimoni Delasu.
HeMan – big guns and captain of the Cartoon XV