Reddit can be a strange old place, but one Welshman has posted a quite superb prediction for the future of French rugby.
France’s World Cup campaign was a new low for a national side that has been in decline in recent years, culminating in a hammering at the hands of eventual champions New Zealand.
What comes next will be the source of much soul-searching in France – but does one Welshman have the answer? Well, no, probably not – but his attempt (which may contain some choice language…) is quite hilarious:
Credit to @Crutypus for finding this.
Hilarious!! He’d obviously thought about this a lot!!!!
se do us next.God knows what he would come up with for England! If you are reading this sir, please do us next.
Easily done
The post world cup review panel assemble at HQ and after 15 cups of tea and several slices of cake the only conclusion is that there aren’t enough people in the room called Ian or enough people with knighthoods and that they aren’t too concerned about the impartiality of the panel. 2 weeks later they reconvene having added Sir Ian Mckellen, Sir Ian Botham and Mrs Lancaster to the panel.
After much deliberation they identify two route causes: 1. The squad was too young and inexperienced 2. We were a bit unlucky. On that basis they decide to keep faith in the current management team and extend their contracts a further 4 years to 2023.
The six nations rolls round and England scrap through their first three games on the back of excellent defence before exorcising their world cup daemons by smashing Wales by a record score. In the final game they lose to France by a record score meaning that they finish 2nd on points difference to Wales.
On the summer tour England whitewash Australia whose scrum falls to bits after Ladezma leaves in a row over unpaid wages. In the AI’s England narrowly beat SA before they narrowly lose to NZ after trailing the whole game but scoring a try with the clock dead to make the scores look close.
Lancaster is on fine form with the media and convinces them that the issues at the world cup are all a thing of the past and England are stronger than ever before releasing a second autobiography covering the last 2 years of his tenure entitled “War of the Coaches: How English rugby was saved from the brink of disaster again”
2017 Six nations England finish 2nd on points difference again, Summer tour they manage 1 draw and in the AI they manage to beat to All Blacks after a mysterious case of food poisoning leaves them weakend.
2018 Six nations England finish 2nd again, Summer tour they manage 1 draw and in the AI’s they manage to beat Australia again. After 7 years of finishing 2nd England decide to boycott the 2019 Six Nations unless they introduce the bonus point system and after legal proceeding the rules are changed and a behind closed door financial compensation settlement agreed with the RFU, of which the PRL demand half.
In 2019 England complete the grandslam but finish 2nd in the tournament to Ireland who picked up bonus points in all 5 of their games while England got none. In the summer they manage to pick up wins against Ireland and France and enter the RWC in Japan as the Northern Hemispheres great hope before finishing second in the group to Fiji and getting knocked out by South Africa in the quarters
The RFU decide that they need to review England’s performance and recall the 2015 review panel to HQ.
The End
p.s. We are not as good as the media thinks we are
Tres bon monsieur! Or something like that?
Hey Hosie wheres my post gone. Took me ages to write that up
Sorry Leon it got caught in a queue for some reason. I’ve approved it now.
thanks Jamie. i tried reposting it so you can reject the second attempt